KUBLER-ROSS GRIEVING PROCESS
“THE BUCKET LIST”
By: Cecelia Z. Harrison
There are five stages of grief; denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. With these stages come the knowledge of grief and its effects on us which equips us to cope with life and loss. These stages are responses to loss that many people have, but there is not a typical response to loss as there is no typical loss. Our grief is as individual as our lives. The five stages are, denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance which is the foundation of learning to live with the “lost”. They are tools to help us identify what we may be feeling. Not ...view middle of the document...
It is natural to feel deserted and abandoned which is where bargaining comes in.
After bargaining, our attention moves into the reality of it all. Empty feelings present themselves, and grief enters our lives on a deeper level, deeper than we ever imagined. This depressive stage starts and it feels as though it will last forever. It’s important to understand that this depression is not a sign of mental illness. It is the appropriate response to a great loss and or tragic event. We withdraw from life, left in a fog of intense sadness, wondering, perhaps, if there is any point in going on alone. Why go on at all? Because grieving is a process of healing, then depression is one of the most necessary steps along the way.
Acceptance is often confused with the idea of being “all right” or “OK” with what has happened. This is not the case. Most people don’t ever feel OK or all right about the loss. This stage is about accepting the reality of that death is permanent. We learn to live with it. Finding acceptance may be just having more good days than bad ones. We invest in our friendships and in our relationship with ourselves. We begin to live again, but we cannot do so until we have given grief its time.
The movie “The Bucket List” was a very excellent example of the five stages of grief mentioned above. The movie focused on two middle aged men whom were both diagnosed with terminal illnesses. Corporate billionaire Edward Cole (Jack Nicholson) and working class mechanic Carter Chambers (Morgan Freeman) have nothing in common except for their terminal illnesses. While sharing a hospital room together, they decide to leave it and do all the things they have ever wanted to do before they die according to their bucket list. In the process, both of them heal each other, become unlikely friends, and ultimately find joy in life. However, they both deal with the news in two totally different ways.
The quiet mechanic, Carter Chambers, has been married for forty-five years to his beloved wife Virginia and has three children. Of the two sons, one is a lawyer and the...